Knocking On Heaven's Door To Release The Potential Within

As I drove home from work yesterday, after a grueling weekend of suffering from stomach sickness, as smile reached across my face arcing into the biggest upturned semi-circle one could imagine. That day I chose to accept the principal's offer of working out during my conference period with a class of the boys. I wasn't sure what to expect, but to my surprise they were well mannered, lighthearted, courteous, and completely disarming. I also agreed that the next day, today, I would take them for mile run, and I did.

Driving home yesterday, Knocking On Heaven's Door played on the radio. I turned it up, belted out the words and experienced a complete and utter satisfaction of being in my skin and my world. The song is more suggestive of a dying experience, but for me the song took on another connotation, one of knocking on heaven's door because of the full potential of my life being released.

Sure, I have two broken down lawn mowers and my grass needs cutting. I have accumulated debt that I'm slowly working through. The master's program isn't a reality for me this year. My employment will end next August. My vehicle is fifteen years old and rattles down the highway. But even with the added strife...I'm still singing.

As the lead guitar solo soulfully sings out it's song to me from the bluesy melody, I felt uplifted and alive. As Annie and I begin to clear the ground for the prairie, discarding the unwanted items, it seems to smack of pulling the same out of our lives, finding out what hindered our growth.

Holding onto broken reality, broken things, broken relationships...we're now releasing these fetters and seeking a new reality, new things and new relationships. It's okay to change, adapt and try something new...and that's where we are.

A Few Things I Do To Cultivate Gratitude

Don Young commented that gratitude is one of the secrets of life. I completely agree with Don and I've been thinking about how to put into words the things I do to cultivate gratitude. So, here they are:

1. Before my feet hit the floor I find three things to be thankful for. I say it out loud and sometimes, it makes me giggle, which is even better.

2. I recognize what I value in other people. Sometimes, people will wonder why I've done something nice for them. I tell people what I like about them, such as how well they write, or take pictures, or how they take time to help other people. What I've noticed is that the value I've recognized continues to surface time and time again.

3. I allow what's good and positive to sink deep into my bones. I do this by enjoying the moment that I'm in. Gratitude is a deep emotion for me.

4. I smile even when I don't feel like smiling. The boys where I teach call this fake it to make it. It's difficult to say something mean and nasty when you've got a smile on your face. Try it, I dare you. :-)

5. I try to look for what is good in everybody and in every situation. I realize that there are some BIGGIES out there that require some whistle blowing and digging up, okay...I'm excluding those. Just try it with the people close to you, like your kids and friends. Stop critiquing and evaluating those that love you.

6. I try to find the positive intention. This comes in way handy for where I work. The boys daily delve into behavior that is quite annoying, but I look beyond the behavior and try to find the unmet need. Usually when I meet that need, the crazy behavior ends.

7. I have been trying hard to master this objective...sending thank yous. Just taking time to send a thank you to someone. Some people are quite thrown off guard by this simple gesture. I also look for the "quiet heroes" in my life, that don't toot their own horn.

8. I've made a list of the people in my life that I am grateful for, who have encouraged me. I go out of my way to let them know how much I appreciate them. I'm thinking that sometimes, this small act on my part may come at a perfect time for them.

That's my how to be more grateful to do list. Ultimately, you are in charge of how you respond to the events of life. Why not respond gratefully?

Grace and Gratitude Nourish Hope

This weekend, starting about 2AM Saturday morning, I was hit with a bout of sickness. Every hour until 1PM Saturday afternoon, the sickness didn't subside. I was supposed to bring Jesse sandwich fixings for him and his sister, but I was unable to get very far. Around 3PM, Jesse called inquiring as to what happened to me. I explained how I was feeling, which then prompted Jesse to making a run to the store where he purchased plenty of Gatorade, Immodium AD and Pepto.

Jesse has that kind spirit that always has him looking out for others. He lost his mom and dad, both to cancer. Right now, he has two sisters fighting cancer...one isn't doing so well, the other is responding to experimental treatment down in San Antonio. Bringing the Gatorade and other medications had me very grateful. There's such a grace about Jesse--a graciousness that's disarming and refreshing.

I listen to people a lot. I listen to their spoiled remarks. I listen to how we allow foolish little things annoy us and we give our strength to things that should not even get our attention.

Gratitude is a powerful thing. It produces resiliency and hope. Gratitude encourages the heart. Gratitude heals.

There's been research that draws a direct correlation between gratitude and health:

Research suggests that grateful people have more energy and optimism, are less bothered by life's hassles, are more resilient in the face of stress, have better health, and suffer less depression than the rest of us. People who practice gratitude--and yes, it is something one can learn and improve--are also more compassionate, more likely to help others, less materialistic, and more satisfied with life. Lisa Aspinwall, PhD University of Utah

Gratitude really does have a way of changing everything...beginning with how you feel.

Wink's Beautiful Starlets

During the Roy Orbison Festival, Shelby Richardson was crowned Pretty Woman. Durango commented that all Wink Women look alike, well...I'm here to provide some evidence that, that's not the case. Several new Wink beauties were caught on film, strutting the latest designs and hair-dos. Some might even say they look like a gaggle of angels or maybe a flock of seagulls.

The senior football boys dressed in drag to raise awareness and money for children with Down's Syndrome. A ceremonious beauty pageant was attended by all, and although we got plenty of laughs, we were reminded that any effort to aid a cause is worth doing.

My View of H.R. 3200 continued (this could take a lot of blogging)

I've continued to read the H.R. 3200 bill and have come across another crucial piece that I'm liking quite a bit. That's the "timely payment of claims" portion. I'm not sure if it only applies to the national payor or to all private insurance in general. I've billed medical insurance for thirteen years. Medicare always paid timely, you just had to make sure you had the following: Certificate of Medical Necessity, qualifying diagnosis, every little box that needed to be checked, properly checked...you would usually see a turn around of about 4 to 8 days. Private insurance on the other hand, usually needed a preauthorization, then an authorization, then a participating physician, a prescription, and had to be filed within 30 to 90 days depending upon the carrier.

Blue Cross Blue Shield was notorious for "never" receiving the claim. And unless you had a good aging report that caught these unpaid claims quickly, a lot of times you'd be out of luck, because then you'd be out of timely filing. With medicare, you have 18 months to file the claim. Why so long? Well, sometimes a service may be provided in the emergency room, by a resident or visiting doctor. That doctor is the attending and ordering physician. If that doctor is visiting he/she may not be there anymore when you send the certificate of medical necessity for his/her signature. That's when the real fun begins...tracking down that doctor. So, if this bill requires private insurance to follow in the steps of medicare then that will be a big improvement in our healthcare system.

Here's a part of the bill that I think answers or quells all those people screaming that we won't have access to doctors:


No Restrictions on Coverage Unrelated to Clinical Appropriateness- A qualified health benefits plan may not impose any restriction (other than cost-sharing) unrelated to clinical appropriateness on the coverage of the health care items and services.


I'm not seeing where there will be long lines of people just waiting to see the doctor. I'm also not seeing where people will be denied preventative maintenance, yearly check ups or delay in getting treatment. I know I got lots more to read, but so far...it's good.

Big Ed Lopez the Cowboy Fan...Not Durango's Big Ed

A couple of days ago I mentioned to Durango that a few of my friends from work attended the Dallas Cowboy's game in Arlington on Sunday using the ever popular Party Pass. After reading his blog, I wondered if my friends were one of the lucky ones that actually got in to see the game.

Not only did Big Ed Lopez get into the game, but he was featured in the big game's program. Soon we were all a buzz over this fantastical happening out here in West Texas. Big Ed Lopez was then interviewed by the local 9 News West and was a feature story on the television.

It's quite an entertaining news story. Big Ed Lopez was also featured in the Odessa American. I was also given a very cute baby shower invite which resembled a Dallas Cowboy game ticket.

Tsk...Tsk...Tsk...Hutchison is such a Cop Out!

A while ago, I sent a pleasant email to Kaye Bailey Hutchinson, pleading with her to consider co-sponsoring the FRAC Act. Here's my email:

I urge you to co-sponsor H.R. 2766/S. 1215 to repeal the exemption for hydraulic fracturing in the Safe Drinking Water
Act and require public disclosure of the chemicals used in hydraulic fracturing fluids. This exemption, also known as the "Halliburton Loophole," means that hydraulic fracturing, an increasingly common aspect of the oil and gas production process, is not subject to the same standards as other industries when it comes to protecting underground sources of drinking water. It is one of several environmental loopholes granted to the oil and gas production industry. Hydraulic fracturing involves the injection of fluids, often containing toxic chemicals, into oil or gas wells at very high pressure. This technique fractures the underground formation and can cause underground sources of drinking water to become contaminated. Other forms of underground injection are regulated under the Safe Drinking Water Act to protect drinking water, but in 2005 Congress exempted hydraulic fracturing from the act to benefit Halliburton and other oil and gas companies. I am concerned that some families have already experienced drinking water contamination linked to hydraulic fracturing operations. Communities across the country are suffering from pollution caused by the oil and gas industry. We should hold this industry to the same standards as any other and close the Halliburton Loophole, and all other loopholes, to achieve consistent federal oversight. Natural gas may be an important part of our energy portfolio, but the right balance needs to be established between oil and
gas development and protection of our precious natural
resources, including clean air and clean water. This legislation is simple, straightforward and reasonable, and I hope you will co-sponsor it. Every American deserves clean drinking water. Sincerely, Joely Trujillo P O BOX 337 Wink, TX 79789

And here's how she responded:

Thank you for contacting me regarding S. 1215, the Fracturing Responsibility and Awareness of Chemicals Act (FRAC). I welcome your thoughts and comments. On June 9, 2009, Senator Robert Casey Jr. (D-PA) introduced S. 1215. Hydraulic fracturing pumps large volume fluids into a formation. The formation warms and causes a high-pressure combustion to increase oil production. The FRAC Act would amend the Safe Drinking Water Act to require companies to disclose the chemicals they use in their hydraulic fracturing processes. On the same day the legislation was introduced, the FRAC Act was referred to the Committee on Environment and Public Works, on which I do not serve. Should S. 1215 come for consideration before the full Senate, please be assured that I will keep your comments in mind. I appreciate hearing from you, and I hope that you will not hesitate to contact me on any issue that is important to you. Sincerely, Kay Bailey Hutchison United States Senator

I've read and re-read this email several times, and for the life of me...I can't figure out if she's for it or against it. So, I sent a follow up email asking her to clarify her position:

As your constituent and a supporter of the work of the League of
Conservation Voters, I just became aware of your poor environmental voting record in the 2005 National Environmental Scorecard. I am deeply disappointed that you consistently voted against commonsense environmental protections. When it comes to protecting our air, water and natural heritage from corporate polluters and developing a forward-looking energy policy, we need a Member of Congress who will stand up and do the right thing. You conveniently told me that you do not serve on the FRAC Act committee, while omitting vital information: "On the same day the legislation was introduced, the FRAC Act was referred to the Committee on Environment and Public Works, on which I do not serve. Should S. 1215 come for consideration before the full Senate, please be assured that I will keep your comments in mind." What comments of mine will you keep in mind? That the toxic water used in fracturing is deadly? I'm curious to know your feelings on the FRAC Act and what way you plan on voting. I believe that as MY STATE
representative in the senate, I have a right to know. You owe me full disclosure. I am hoping that your constituency and I can count on you to represent our views and vote to protect the environment more frequently in the key debates expected in the second session of the 109th Congress. Sincerely, Joely Trujillo

I can't wait to get a response. It's like waiting to open Christmas presents!

Scantily Clad Men Serving at Hooters

I spent most of my Saturday over in Midland and Odessa. My primary reason for being in Midland was to keep a laser hair removal appointment with my laser technician, Alma. She says I've got one more appointment and then I'm done. I like the permanent hair removal. Having the hair removed permanently has decreased my prep time in the tub. All that shaving was a huge hassle! Word of caution to anyone whose interested in this process...don't wait. The laser only affects dark hair, so if you wait too long and it starts to turn grey...well, then you're less of a candidate for laser hair removal.

My secondary reason for the trip into town was to buy poster paint. I'm responsible for creating 4 catchy homecoming slogans for football signs. There was only one place for me to go and that was to Hobby Lobby. Hobby Lobby for me is like Bed, Bath and Beyond for others. I just love Hobby Lobby. Well, the Hobby Lobby that I frequent is right next to Hooters. Usually Hooters has scantily clad women, but today I got a treat! Outside in front of Hooters were men in speedo swimsuits washing cars!

I was very curious and wondered why there were men washing cars and not women in bikinis. As I got closer, I observed that these brave young men wearing skimpy swim wear were the swim team for UTPB. Apparently, they were putting on a car wash for a fund raising event. I've got to get a better camera, because I sure would of liked to have had a few pictures.

Ghost Rider by Neil Peart Chapter 8 We Are Islands to Each Other

It took the boys and I almost two weeks to get through Chapter 8 of Ghost Rider. Ever since the unfortunate imprisonment of Neil's friend, Brutus, the style of writing changes and becomes informal letter writing. As Neil pens these letters to Brutus, he periodically stops and asks, "Are you with me here? I know you are." The first time I read that out loud, a cold shiver ran up my spine...the boys also stopped looking at their books, because I suppose the way I read it, was more like I was asking them the question.

What does Neil mean by that? I questioned. One boy responded, "Neil carries Brutus with him as if he were really there." Yes, I agreed, maybe Neil needed to feel connected to something because what he once knew was gone...Jackie, Selena, the music...all of it. Only his friendships remained.

In chapter 8, Neil crosses into Mexico and gets all the way down into Belize. I shared with the boys my one and only trip to Belize. I was 18 years old, away at college. A mission group selected me to do puppets, singing and piano at a small church in Lady Ville, Belize. I spent a week there with 11 other college students. Although, the experience occurred many years ago, each face and memory remains vivid and etched deep within my psyche.

There were quite a few metaphorical terms I had to explain such as "phantom pain" and "no room at the inn." Neil describes the melancholy for Selena and Jackie as phantom pain. Missing something that used to be there, feeling their presence, but realizing that they're no longer there. I told the boys of soldiers that would lose a limb, but could still feel pain as if the limb were really there.

The end of chapter 8 had Neil back in Mexico. He left his bike to be repaired, booked a flight and headed back to Canada for the month of December.

The evening plane rises up from the runway

Over constellations of light

I look down into a million houses

And wonder what you're doing tonight

If I could wave my magic wand

I'd make everything all right

Presto, 1990

HCG Diet, Side Effect...Fat Eradication

I did two rounds of the HCG Diet, once in March and then again in May or June. The only side effect I noticed was fat eradication. My hair didn't fall out, my skin didn't go bad or I didn't experience any ill effects that I'm aware of. It's not like this diet just popped up on the market, I mean it did in the United States, but it's been around since the 40's in Europe.

I did both drops and shots. I didn't like the drops, not because they tasted bad, but because you had to hold the HCG under your tongue for 30 seconds and that was difficult. And then, you couldn't drink anything for 15 minutes. Since I took the drops in the morning after waking, it interfered with my java intake.

With the shots, I didn't have to worry about not drinking anything or worry about holding the liquid under my tongue. The shots just seemed to be easier for me to do. Giving yourself a shot probably sounds scary, but it isn't. The needle is very minute and it wasn't painful at all. I did have experience because of the glucagon that I injected for hypoglycemia, but even without that experience I still think I would have been fine.

I lost a total of 37 pounds. I went from a size 10-12 to a size 4. You don't have to work out or exercise on the diet, but I did. I weight lifted in order to firm my body after losing the weight. Also, from being on the diet, I found that I had retrained myself on eating habits. Today, I find that I still skip breakfast without any negative side effects. I usually have an apple around mid-morning and then tuna and crackers for the afternoon. I rarely have a meal at night, I just snack on something like a salad with cucumbers and maybe a few slices of turkey.

I'm thinking I still need to drop about 10 to 15 pounds more. With that thought, I've thought about doing one last round of HCG beginning in October. This way, I'll insulate myself against Winter gain and Thanksgiving and Christmas goodies.

Here's another recipe from the HCG Gourmet Cookbook:
Tomato Basil Soup
2 cups chicken or vegetable broth
2 cups chopped fresh tomatoes
3 ounces of tomato paste
4-6 leaves of fresh basil rolled and sliced
1-2 cloves garlic crushed and minced
2 tbs chopped onion
1 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp dried oregano
Pinch of marjoram
Salt and black pepper to taste
Puree all ingredients in a food processor or blender. Pour into a saucepan and heat to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 20 to 30 minutes. Serve hot, garnish with fresh basil leaves or parsley.