Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Testing Your Goals -- Against Toxic People

Last time I said I would reveal a test that I used to make sure the goals I have for myself belong to me and are not the expectations of others. This week will be an extremely trying one, as the most toxic person in my life will actually be spending a few days at the house. This toxic person was very dominant and forced his expectations onto me. I allowed myself to think for a very long time that I was doing the things I was doing because I wanted to. It wasn't until I dropped everything and went back to college, that the facade came tumbling down. Knowing that he could no longer impose his will onto me, he sought out to put down all my efforts to succeed in my true goals. It's hard to realize something like this, when the toxic person doing this to you, is supposed to love you.

1. Why do I want to have this, do this, or become this?
2. How will achieving this goal contribute to my grand design?
3. How will accomplishing this goal make a difference?
4. What will my life look like if I don't achieve this goal?

What I've learned that if the goal isn't really mine, when it gets difficult, I'll give up and quit. Every goal will cost you something; time, money, energy. Next time, I'll show what I did to figure out what kind of resources I had available to me.


Durango said...

Incoming Toxic Person. I feel your dread. If he turns toxic, laugh at him, shake your head and walk away.

Cheap Tricks and Costly Truths said...

Thanks for the encouragement :)

Gar said...

Unfortunately, if I were in your situation and had incoming toxicity, I would point them to the Kermit Inn.

Which goal are you trying to accomplish by having toxicity live with you for a few days?

Cheap Tricks and Costly Truths said...

An uncontested divorce